Eons

Too often....it's true....everything changes and it changes so fast. The expectations on yourself are really put there by yourself. It's you, thinking about what you think everybody needs, and wanting from you. The key....the beauty...if you don't buy their bullshit they're selling then it doesn't matter what they think. The best qualities that anyone can have is to learn how to be their own best friend. I missed that lesson....I never understood. So instead of bullshit; listeb to and trust myself.

Sweetest Girl

My daughter and I were out for a walk when she saw a bundle of tulips on a Memorial. She ran over excitedly shouting about finding flowers and how beautiful they were. When she wanted to pick them up bc they were 'cut flowers' (so she wouldn't be picking them) I explained to her the following...... These flowers are here on a 'Memory Stone' for someone who has died (Yes I said died); like how Ellie's (our cat) body became ill and when she died her soul went to the stars. So this stone is for people to remember the person who they have lost, and a way to remember and celebrate a life of someone who has passed is to put flowers on their Memory Stone and that's why we leave them. I then read the plaque to her. Those red tulpis were Sid Harrison' s flowers. At the end of the plaque it said; "always in our hearts" which is exactly what we tell our 3 year old daughter about Ellie. That even though she has died that her soul is with the stars and that she lives on because she is I  our hearts. So......here's the precious part. ....on our way home Claire picks up some flowers that have fallen from a tree and she carries them home. EVER SO GENTLY she carries these flowers. She looks up at me and says "these flowers are for Ellie Mom. She is forever in my heart". The picture here is of Claire 'planting' the flowers in the garden beside Ellie's Memory Stone <3

Drop a stitch, add a stitch, going crazy

The hardest thing to do is often to be less judgmental of ourselves. That mistakes happen (even when they are such a small simple thing) and to remember that we shouldnt let the mistake dim our inner light with disappointment. Feel the sad. Let it go. Learn from it and you will become better equipped for going forward into the future :-)

Newer Hats:-)

Thought it worth while to show that my crocheting talents have increased:-)

Too Many

There are just too many things to do. Go to work, 12 kids under 3, pick up this, drive here, dinner…shit…DINNER! Bath-time, bedtime, tomorrow lunches. Laundry, Did I eat Lunch today? Water; drink more. Cry a little. Vacuum, garbages out. Brush your teeth, hair fixing for the 7th? 7th time today. Kisses. Slowdown. Breathe. Okay, Im done. No crocheting today :-(  didnt talk to my sister today :-(   I did see other family:-)   Stress over writing a good "go" versus write for release. Reeeelaaaaaaax. *Sigh* time for sleep ...... :-)

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Grandpa Callard

It has been way too long since Ive last written......thing is, life-changing events have taken place and I needed time to process before being in a place where I was willing to amplify my emotions through the release of writing.

I know a man who has worked his whole life,
And he wears the hats of many men.
A Husband, a Father, a Grandfather, a brother;
A man by the name of Raymond.
This man taught lessons numerous,
With his action he led his way.
Always with a fire for justice,
Always with honor complete at the end of his days.
This man taught me you never stop dreaming,
That you must always have a plan.
He taught me Discipline, Respect, and laughter.
He taught me to lend a helping hand.
For this man was my Grandpa,
Who's love for us was infinitely strong.
I will never say goodbye to him,
For in our hearts he lives forever on.

Raymond Callard RIP xoxoxoxo

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Family

Loving Life xoxo

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